I just bought Japanese food at Mr. Hana restaurant in a food court, and the receipt asked that I follow them on twitter.
I understand they might advertise special offers every so often; but other than that, what else can Mr. Hana possibly have to say?
– “Mr. Hana…is still cooking.”
– “Mr. Hana…says, ‘God, I hate customers.’”
– “Mr. Hana…just dropped some spicy chicken on the floor…but Mr. Hana believes in the ten second rule.”
Do you think Mr. Hana ever gets philosophical?
“Mr. Hana…is wondering if the inability to self-create precludes the possibility for true ethical responsibility.”
Am I going to be influenced by Mr. Hana’s opinions? Is there an actual Mr. Hana? Is this Mr. Hana doing better than I am, career-wise? Is Mr. Hana in a relationship? Is Mr. Hana in a relationship with a hot chick or, like, Panda Express? If I follow Mr. Hana, will it/s/he also follow me? Is Mr. Hana more popular than I am? Does Mr. Hana have better taste in YouTube clips? Am I worthwhile? Are these the correct life decisions I’m making?
Can’t I just order a teriyaki chicken bowl?!